-Don't you trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die

-Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why we call it 'The Present'

-so that now good judgment comes from experience, and that a lot of that comes from bad judgment

-And you never know how strong she is until she is put in hot water.

-But sometimes if you discover yourself all smiles in a crisis you've found someone to blame.

-Dont ask me why you cause some happiness wherever you go. You cause the same whenever they go too.

-By the way my discovery today was that crowded elevators smell different to midgets!

-Although my biggest concern was that some devil tripped me up about the stair-case and...and i had to get down and tie my shoes!

-So then i had to remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off!

-I have no regrets in life, including the fuck ups

-In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on...

-No, I said I was fully trained in SECOND aid. Which means I can give you looks of concern until someone that knows first aid gets here!

-So I really have got worms that have got their very own!

-And... and do i mumble when in doubt?

-Come on, look here... in 1 week 18 die from eating cucumbers, everyone stops eating them.Every single week 100,000 die from smoking and no one stops. Am telling you we are nuts!

-But all i know it's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end!

-I am so so sorry that my alarm clock is jealous of the relationship I have with my bed.Am terrible sorry!